CHERISH Team - Discipleship in Swaziland.Isaiah 61:1-4

Beauty for Ashes T-shirt - Get Becca to Swaziland

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 00:00:00 GMT

I remember the first time I got up in front of the congregation at church and told them how the Lord had called me to Swaziland and I needed financial and prayer support to go for two years. I came home and cried my eyes out; it was the most humbling thing I had ever done. Stick me in a mud hut with no electricity but please don't make me ask for money.

Well, the time has come for me to go to Swaziland again and wouldn't you know it, the airline is still asking for money. This time I'm just going for a two-week trip and I'm leaving in late August. The purpose has several purposes - 1) There are three faithful Swazi women who have been carrying out the Bible Studies since I've left and I want to go love on and encourage them. 2) Last December I went to a very rural part of Swaziland where orphans and widows were literally starving. My church just put money together and bought them blankets and food and I'm going to go check up on them and encourage and love on my brothers and sisters in Christ. 3) The reason I'm going at this particular time is because one of my best friends is getting married and she's asked me to be part of the ceremony.

I need to raise $2000 for my flight, food, and transportation while I'm there. My friend, Natalie (who also used to live in Swaziland) and I are selling t-shirts to raise money for our trip. DISCLAIMER - THEY ARE GIRLY SHIRTS, SEE THE PICTURE. MEN, BUY THEM FOR YOUR WIVES, DAUGHTERS, SISTERS, MOTHERS... Anyway, you can buy a t-shirt and support the trip or you can support the trip and get a free t-shirt, however you want to look at it.

Here's how:

Bakersfield people - You can send me give me cash or check for $20/shirt and let me know what size you want. They are unisex adult t-shirts and will shrink.
Non-Bakersfieldians -
1. You can send a check for $25/shirt (extra added for shipping) and I will mail you the shirt. Address - 7604 Okanagan Ct., Bakersfield, CA 93309. Make sure you tell me what size shirt.
2. If you have a PayPal account you can give $25 by clicking the "send money" tab and type in my email address (bebop104@yahoo.com). Make sure for the reason you click the "personal" tab and click "gift". Make sure you tell me what size shirt.
Forward this email to friends who would be interested in purchasing a shirt.

I need to raise money ASAP to buy my plane ticket before prices go up.

Pray for me, this is not about plane tickets or t-shirts or fundraising, the Lord's up to more than that and He is using this to stretch me once again.

February Update

Wed, 4 Mar 2009 00:00:00 GMT

Schools started in Swaziland the last week of January, so February marked the first month the Cherish team was back in the high schools teaching God's desire for sexual purity to the high school girls. The team dynamics have changed since the school year finished in December. Two of the Swazi team members have left; one of the two was accepted into University in South Africa so we are praising God for the favor on Zabiba's life. Swazie and Phumlile remain on the team and Swazie's younger sister, Gugu, has joined after completing high school at the last year.

[Picture: (L to R) Gugu, Phumlile, and Swazie]

There are also three American girls, Alyssa, Alene, and Jessica (http://jessicagourley.myadventures.org), who have committed to minister with the Cherish team until May. These girls have come through AIM to serve for 5 months in Swaziland through a program called First Year Missionary (FYM). Alyssa, Alene, and Jessica are also discipling the Swazi team by studying different women and their character in the Bible i.e. Ruth, Esther etc. as well as helping driving the team to the schools. Phumlile said she learned faithfulness from the example of Ruth. The Lord has been faithful by bringing Alyssa, Alene, and Jessica.

[Jessica, Alyssa, and Alene washing the students' feet at Phumelele High School]

While the HIV rate is devastating the country, it is vital to get this message of purity to as many teenage girls as possible. This year they have returned to one school from last year, Ngwane Central, and have started at four new schools: Victorious, Moyeni, KC Academy, and Phumelele. This is an answer to prayer because when I (Becca) was praying where to take this ministry last year the Lord made it clear to take it to the four regions in Swaziland. Last year, the team reached three of the four but the fourth region, the Manzini region, we could not get into. This year, ALL of the new schools are in the Manzini region; All in His perfect timing!

There are 30 Junior and Senior girls in each school going through the 8 week Bible study. The Cherish team of 6 breaks up into 3 teams with one Swazi leader and one American leader. That's 30 girls x 5 schools = 150 new girls getting this message of purity. Praise the Lord that He is raising up a generation of women in Swaziland who are seeking after Him. Last week's lesson included the Gospel presentation and girls at every school received Christ! Even before this lesson, when the team opened it up for questions the girls were asking "We want to be Christians, what do we do? How can we be devoted Christians?"
[Above: New students at Ngwane Central]

Praise: 1) For the seeds of the Gospel planted! Pray they have fallen on good soil in these girls and that they will flourish in their relationship with Christ.
2) For the unity of the new Cherish team and the arrival of Alyssa, Alene & Jessica

Pray: 1) Transportation - One of the Swazi members who left the team had a drivers license and now the girls cannot get to a school who has requested the Bible Study. The American girls are obligated to something else that day as a part of their FYM program. Public transportation is too unpredictable for the long distance they must travel to this school. Pray for a solution according to the will of God for the team.

Situation in Swaziland

Sat, 10 Jan 2009 00:00:00 GMT

I just saw this article on someone else's website and wanted to share it with you for you to praise God that light was shed on this darkness and the girls are free but also to pray because this is not the only place this happens. This was about 10 minutes drive from where I lived. This ministry to the girls of Swaziland for sexual purity is VITAL and the ministry needs your support as they fight on the front lines!

MBABANE, 7 January 2009 (IRIN) - The discovery of two brothels where underage girls worked for just food in a township in central Swaziland has triggered both shock and sympathy in a country struggling with chronic poverty and food insecurity.

For years there have been anecdotal reports of desperate women, unable to find work at the Matsapha Industrial Estate where Swaziland's few factories are clustered, exchanging sex for food to feed themselves or their children. But until a raid this weekend on two "hostels" in Mbhuleni township, across the highway from Mastapha, there had been no evidence of an organised brothel-based sex trade.

Media reports said the police, with the help of the local community, closed down the two brothels in Mbhuleni where a total of 35 girls, aged from 14 to 17, were trading sex for basic meals served in the neighbourhood cafes, or alcohol, provided either by their pimps or directly by their clients.

"Even a place crime-ridden like Mbhuleni has its limits, and this is definitely not Swazi-like what was going on," said Samuel Ndwandwe, a community policeman. "They were making money off those starving children. They were turning our sisters into whores."

Found
Maxwell Gama's* sister went missing two months ago. As soon as school closed for the Christmas holiday, the 16-year-old left the family farm to help his mother search for her in Matsapha, 60km away.

"It was terrible because we checked all the police stations to see if they had found young women my sister's age. She is 17. My mother and I even went to the hospital and the mortuary to see if there was a body they couldn't identify. We went to Matsapha because that is where she said she was going to find work. There is no work where we live," he told IRIN.

Too many people are hungry, those girls had nothing. I am so saddened by the life they chose, but I feel sorry for them more than I condemn them

Gama and his mother got a tip that she had been swept up in the police raid, and finally made contact. "She ran away when she saw us. She said she was too ashamed. I want to get her out of this place and take her home!"

None of the girls picked up by the police have been charged with a crime, but the owners of the brothels are being sought for questioning. The child welfare organisation, Save the Children, has stepped in to help reunite the girls with their families, and the Swaziland Action Group Against Abuse, located in the central commercial city of Manzini, aims to investigate organised sexual exploitation in Matsapha.

Media report said the girls freed by the police were seeking jobs, shelter or just food, with some having fled abuse at home. At the brothels they were fed if they had sex - typically a plate of rice and beans, or maize meal porridge and meat if the local butchery was open at the time.

"Too many people are hungry, those girls had nothing. I am so saddened by the life they chose, but I feel sorry for them more than I condemn them," said Reverend Jeremiah Vilakati, who preaches in Mbhuleni township.

An estimated 40 percent of Swazis are unemployed; after a slightly better harvest last year, the ratio of people currently being fed by relief agencies has fallen to four out of 10. "What we are seeing at Matsapha is the exploitation of starving women and girls by Swazi men who are taking advantage of the humanitarian crisis," said social welfare worker Felix Vilane.

"We know these are difficult times, but the challenge for Swaziland is how to look after its children so they don't have to run away from home to find something to eat, and do unspeakable things to survive."

Swaziland, sandwiched between South Africa and Mozambique, is sub-Saharan Africa's last absolute monarchy. Although classified as a middle-income country, wealth is concentrated in the hands of the royal family. Poverty is sharpened by the world's highest rate of HIV infection.

* Not his real name

Becca in Swaziland

Fri, 12 Dec 2008 00:00:00 GMT

www.beccaiscrucified.blogspot.com - Pictures of Becca's trip so far...

8 weeks already?

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I can't believe the girls have already gone through an entire 8 week study with a new group of girls since I've been gone. Some days it feels like I haven't seen them in forever and then somedays (like today) I wake up after a dream that I was just there. The Cherish team and Christine, a volunteer from the States, were working at AIM care points. Care points are community centers where orphans and vulnerable children come for 1 meal per day and is a safe place for them. The care points put in place by the government but Christian organizations come and sponsor them and AIM has a discipleship team (D-team) that teaches the kids the Word of God.

57 girls just completed the study and joy filled my heart as I saw these girls. Just more and more confirmation that God will act and accomplish His will in Swaziland no matter where I am. It's freeing and humbling. Please check out Christine's update http://christinechenoweth.myadventures.org/?filename=cherish

Changes

Sat, 25 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Some changes I wanted to give you a head's up on.

1. This blog will only be used to update with the happenings of the Cherish team in Swaziland.

2. If you'd like to give either monthly or a one time amount to the amazing things God is doing in Swaziland through the Cherish team you can scroll down and on the left side it says "support cherish". This will go directly to the AIM account to give the team a salary and provide the needs for the ministry. If you do this, please send me an email at becca.d.christian@gmail.com. I'm responsible for the ministry continuing to be funded and I need to know what money is going into the fund. I no longer have an account with AIM because I'm no longer working for them.

3. I have a new place to post what God's doing in my life. I miss not being able to share everything that He's doing all the time like I did in Africa. Same God, different location and I love sharing it. Please go to http://beccaiscrucified.blogspot.com and click on "subscribe via email" on the right side to continue to get emails when I post something new.

No longer working for Adventures in Missions but still enjoying the adventure in the mission God has called me to - furthering His Kingdom.

From the Field

Wed, 22 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT

My body is unmistakably in Bakersfield but my heart and thoughts are still very much in Swaziland. I called the Cherish team last week to find out how things were going. It's so fun to hear their voices and laughter especially when they are laughing at me in my quickly-fading siSwati...

This school term (September - December) is extremely busy for the students because of exams and makes it next to impossible to meet for Bible Study on a regular basis. I know with God all things are possible but if we are going to do something let's do it well and it's done best in January through August.

For the Cherish team this means they are only going to the schools on Fridays, visiting each school now once a month. When the team goes they give each girl a hand written note encouraging them on their exams and they meet, encourage, talk and pray with the girls in the Cherish groups. On one school visit the team was informed that two more leaders have fallen pregnant. I tried to brainstorm ideas of what we could do to avoid this but Zabiba, a member of the team, assured me "this is a spiritual attack".

Please Pray with us. Lord, I pray that the Cherish members would be strong in you and your mighty power. I pray they would put on your full armor so they may take their stand against the devil's schemes. Their struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms (Eph. 6:10-13) but Christ you disarmed these powers and authorities, and made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross (Col 2:15). We proclaim your victory in the lives of those whom you live in in Swaziland.

Lord we pray for the girls who have fallen into temptation and fallen pregnant. May they approach your throne of grace with confidence, so that they may receive mercy and find grace to help them in their time of need (Hebrews 4:16).

So what are the girls doing besides Fridays? They are going to the AIM (Adventures in Missions) care points (community centers where orphans and vulnerable children can come and receive food). There is already a team doing discipleship (the D-team) with the children at the carepoints but the CHERISH team is now meeting with the older girls. They are currently getting to minister to 51 young women. Praise God!! It just shows again, that God will accomplish His purposes and He doesn't need any of us. He's still furthering His Kingdom in Swaziland with the young women and I'm not there - Praise Him!

**I call the team regularly to ask them questions to see how they are doing. Are there any questions you have for the team?**

Letter from Swaziland

Tue, 30 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I thought you would enjoy reading an email I just got from Swaziland. This is from my brother Musa in Swaziland who works with the D-team (Discipleship Team) at the Care Points (community feeding centers for orphans) with AIM. The Cherish team is now working at the Care Points so this is Musa giving me an update on the girls - Hloniphile (Fufu), Phumlile, and Zabiba. If you know Musa, I'm sure you can hear him saying this and if you don't know him...well you need to. I put the parentheses for translation.

Sisi unjani shem ("How are you") ... eish long time.. oh u can get this " mehlo madzala" (I haven't seen you in a long time"), I am with Hlon'phile and they are on their way to Timbutini Care point to minister 4 today... its kind of like crazy for them as they have to jump to the Bus Rank for Public  (transportation)
   to Timbutini which they dont have an idea... how is that sisi! I wil just take them to the bus conductors ... I will make sure I get a Tip!

Anywaiz they are to Timbutini today after they went to last week with the D-Team (Discipleship Team) to introduce themselves.... I think it was of great experience for them as they were... I repeat its like they were forced to eat the liphalishi (corn meal) and emabhontjisi... ha ha ha ... its like its a good meal for them as Phumlile has gained since that meal... wow for Zabiba I think she liked it coz she had an encho! Plus 3 plates, she also helped Fufu on her plate as she was not more interesed in the Liphalishi... eish these girls anywaiz I love them sisi ... its only that you how girls are... girls are girls,now I wil be saying and they wil begin funa kuchama ("they need to go to the bathroom") whiles they coul be doing that nyalo (now),eish ..... sisi agrree with me that they will bring great difference of what they wil be teaching at the CarePoints.. Ya lets shout Yes and Amen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sala kahle sisi...("stay well sisi")
Ngiyakutsandza... (I love you)

So the girls are eating well and taking public transportation. I'll give more detailed update tomorrow. I just laughed when i read this. Oh I miss it over there.

Honestly

Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT

A few entries ago i had promised that I would be processing being back home by writing a lot and would keep you updated on the journey. For some reason i had assumed it would be filled with an assortment of emotions and I just kept waiting for joy and happiness to come so i could write when i felt "good". Instead it's just been wrestling with the Lord, confusion, tears in the most inopportune times, missing my life in Swaziland and all those I love there so bad. So if I can be honest, it's hard. I knew it was going to be hard but it is harder than i thought. I can't catch up with the American pace of life, i keep thinking "how did i ever do this before"? Things are just overwhelming here - the pace, all the stuff, all the media overload, the abundance of choices, the subtle yet everday way society tells American women how they should look which all but 2 women fall short of and the rest of us hang our heads - just everything. Everyone here has been so supportive and loving. To be super cliche i say to all those who i've encountered since i've been here "it's not you, it's me". I happened to read a website of a friend who is still in Swaziland and I read they had a "chick night" with all the American women and she listed who was there and my heart sank. Now to be honest again, they had several of these while i was there and i never actually made it to one but just the fact that i knew all my favorite people were together and continuing on in life over there (which they should). I've also called Fufu, Phumlile, and Zabiba since i've been here and ministry is still going (Praise Him) and it's like of course I want it to it's just hard not to be a part of it. At the same time i'm not really a part of what's going on here either. People have obviously continued living since i've been gone (Praise Him again) but since i'm not "doing anything" as of yet and my feelings of being overwhelmed have pretty much kept me in the house I feel like i'm standing still while things are going on in Swaziland and Bakersfield and I'm standing in between not fully involved in either. I know I just need to give myself time but all this time has given me way too much time to think...So of course, some of you may be thinking "get a job" and of course i'm thinking that too but everytime I go to the Lord about it He keeps saying "wait, rest, be still". I've been soaking in Psalm 37 and reading Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne ( i recommend it but don't read it if you don't have plans of changing). At the same time the Lord has given me little gifts to get through...

He is Faithful

Sun, 28 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT

"Lord, you are my guide, I rely on you. I put my hope in things not seen, your promises are true. You are faithful, your joy is my strength". This is a verse from Hillsong's "You are Faithful" (if you are not familiar with Hillsong, get them in your life).

So if you aren't too depressed after reading that last entry (congrats, that was heavy huh? And that was the edited version, imagine all that the Lord's had to listen to). Yes, it's been hard but life is hard BUT God is faithful and I see more of His faithfulness as I am putting my hope in things not seen (i.e. all the days ahead of me). I have a place to stay, i was given a car to drive, and all of my physical needs are being met so praise you, Lord, for that.

He's given me a lot of "gifts". One is the gift of laughter. My grandpa said (jokingly) to my 13-year-old cousin "Hey did you hear they fired Becca in Africa" and my cousin responded "Did Jesus fire her?"

One of the biggest "gifts" i have been given since i've been home has been the team members from my church who came in August to Swaziland. I will never forget the day my mom and i drove straight to church from LAX and as I was stepping out of the car i hear "Sawubona" (hello in SiSwati) and I was overjoyed and wanted to cry.

The team walked a day in the life of a Swazi girl, they painted their nails, they did crafts, they sang and taught, they filled gift bags, they decorated, they shared their own stories, they even risked their lives one night and slept with wild animals snoring outside. That's all great but you know what impacted me the most is they loved on these precious daughters of the King of Kings who others have neglected and forgotten. They were the extra arms to hug these girls and they are the same arms that are now hugging me here in California and whispering in my ear "i miss the girls too". They lived alongside these beautiful Swazi girls who have stolen my heart and danced with them, ate with them, listened to them, prayed with them, sang with them, and told them how God sees them. When I tell my mom "I miss Phumlile" she doesn't say "now which one is that?" she gets to say..."she has such a sweet spirit or i remember when Phumlile...". They have experienced the beauty of these girls and I'm so thankful to have shared experiences with this team who is now loving me by saying SiSwati phrases and still keeping "inside jokes" alive. :)

Colorado to California

Fri, 12 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT

The jet lag is long gone and I'm back in Bakersfield. The time in Colorado was a gift from the Lord. I love the way he orchestrated my time there. I've been mourning for the last few months since the Lord told me to leave Swaziland and I still had tears streaming down my face as I stood in line to get my passport stamped in D.C. Wednesday morning in CO I got to sit and talk with Lisa, one of my spiritual moms who also just moved back to the States from Swaziland. After we talked I felt a closure to the last season of my life. Thursday I got to sit and dream again with the Lord and remember what I'm passionate about and what excites me in life. Friday, I got to talk to Gary, Lisa's husband, and he confirmed what the Lord had been saying the day before.

So what's next? Following Jesus. Just like when I moved to Swaziland and I didn't know exactly what to expect but that He walked me through day by day. Different location, same God. There are still tears and I think more are yet to come. My life was in Swaziland and I miss that life. Today i heard a song that I would always listen to in the morning when I got ready in Swaziland and I burst into tears because I missed my house there. The Lord just keeps pulling me away and saying "trust me, be still, and trust me" (Psalm 37:3-8). I miss hearing SiSwati being spoken. I miss the "Swazi pace" that always embraced the phrase "There's no hurry in Swaziland". I want to run up and give a hug to every black woman I see and then soon realize they have a funny (American) accent and are not as excited to see me.

On a lighter note - Here's some thoughts since I've been back.

"Wow that building is big, What is that? Answer: Cosco"

"How is she blow-drying her hair in the bathroom with the door shut? Electrical outlets in the bathroom"

(Lisa said) "Honey, you don't have to do that, we have a dishwasher."

I keep trying to turn the lights to a room on from the outside of the room

I keep looking for the switch on the electrical plugs

"Where is everyone? No one is walking around the streets, it's eerily quiet."

"Wow, that's big"

"Wow, that was fast"

"I hear more accents here (airports in the States) than I did in 2 1/2 years living in another country"

Colorado was great. Thank you Gary and Lisa for making me a part of your family and speaking life into me. I also have to say there are a lot of eligible, studly single men there - check out the video. And the one on the right, Noah, Gary and Lisa's youngest son, he can count to 49 :)

Moses, Pray for Joshua

Wed, 10 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT

When the Lord told me I was supposed to go back to California I cried the whole weekend. I was in mourning. On Sunday morning I was crying at the Lord's feet and He said "I'm going to turn your mourning into dancing (Jeremiah 31:13). That did make me smile because I thought "you have got to be kidding me", I'm too upset to do anything but sit here and cry...

"It's better for my kingdom if you go" he whispered. He began to reveal to me that these precious 3 girls that were working with me were to go carry on the work after I've left. He reminded me that when He called me here He was inviting me to join the work He had already began and now that I was leaving He would continue to work.

"You're Moses, pray for Joshua" He said and of course I said, "What does that mean". Moses led the Israelites out of slavery but Joshua led them into their Promise Land. So I asked who Joshua was and He brought one of the girls to mind, one who I've come to call Fufu J. Since there were 3 girls working with me, I didn't want to "promote" one and cause jealousy so I asked the Lord to confirm that Fufu was "Joshua".

Tuesday morning, I woke up and the Lord led me to read about Moses since He had said that I was "Moses". I started with Moses' mom putting him in the basket of course and read the first few chapters of Exodus. When I got to the office that day I was meeting with the Cherish team and Fufu says "I had the strangest dream. I had a dream that my mom took me down to a river and put me in and I was screaming but it's like she was saying it's ok'. I floated down and this other woman found me in the river and picked me up and I went and lived with her". When I picked my mouth off the floor I said "Let's pray girls". We began praying and I looked up the ceiling and mouthed "are you serious?" to the Lord. This was his confirmation that I was supposed to tell the team and I love the way He orchestrated it since it was obvious that it was the Lord who chose Fufu and not me.
Do me a favor, do Fufu a favor, do the young women of Swaziland a favor - Pray for Joshua!!

The little things

Tue, 9 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT

When the Lord told me that August was the close of this season in Swaziland I couldn't imagine leaving so soon. On Wednesday mornings I have Bible Study with a group of American women (and 1 good looking Zambian and a Zimbabwean who just had her first baby J). These women have become my sisters, my aunts, my moms, and even my grandma here. One particular Wednesday morning I woke up in tears and could not stop crying. Swaziland is my home and it has become a part of who I am and me leaving Swaziland was as if a part of me was dying. It was like I was grieving the person I am in Swaziland because she has died. Not that I'm a different person in the States but Swaziland is where I'm fully alive, where I experience joy like never before and where I feel like I'm walking out what God made me to do.

Back to Wednesday morning, about 1 month before I actually had to leave Swaziland. I went to Bible Study but couldn't even participate because the tears were sitting on my bottom eyelids and one word would have opened the floodgates. Finally it was prayer request time and they said "Becca, how can we pray for you" and I burst into tears. I was sobbing and just whispered "I'm hurting" and then I sobbed. As I looked around the table at my family, it was such a beautiful picture of "mourning with those who mourn" in Romans 12. None of them said anything, they just began praying with tears streaming down their faces. I liked that none of them said anything because no words would have made me feel better but to see these women hurting with me was such a picture of Christ because I also knew that He was mourning with me.

That afternoon I just went back to my house and sat at Jesus' feet and wept. Like at Bible Study, there were no words just tears and moans yet it was some of the most intimate prayer time I have had. I didn't have to say anything and He didn't have to say anything but I knew He was there and I knew He wanted me to be there. After a while I finally said "Lord, you don't owe me anything for asking me to leave but if I could ask for two things I think that would help in this process." #1 - I know Swaziland is a small country but could you have a Swazi somewhere in California that I could speak SiSwati with and talk about Swaziland. #2 - Can I go to the 40/40 celebration? (It is the King's 40^th birthday this year and the 40^th year of Swaziland's independence). It is a huge celebration for these people that I have come to love and I would love to share it with them. I continued to cry the rest of the day.

The next day I was sitting in my office and I received an email from someone I didn't know and in just a few short sentences the Lord said YES!

Hi Becca, I've enjoyed reading your blog and what you are doing in Swaziland is a Blessing. I go to RiverLakes, just moved to Bakersfield from NYC, and my husband is a Swazi. We plan on attending the King's 40/40 Celebration in September. If we make it I would love to meet you!

I burst into tears when I read this note and thought "Why do you care?" but He does!! He wants you to ask the desires of your heart, even if they seem small or insignificant so He can give good gifts to His children.

40/40 was a blast and I'm so glad I got to go and be a part of it.

Back in the States

Mon, 8 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT

This may come as a surprise to some but i'm already back in the States. The internet has been down for the last week while I was in Swaziland so sorry for the lack of communication. I'm sitting in Chicago now waiting to board my flight to Colorado Springs where I'll be debriefing with a family who just moved back from Swaziland earlier this year.

I've been crying ever since we started moving on the runway in Swaziland, however I think it helped on my Johannesburg flight because when I started sobbing the lady next to me moved and I got 2 seats to myself on the 16 hour flight so keep that in mind next time you go international :). It was a tearful goodbye and I have to say I'm not excited to be back in the U.S. my home is in Swaziland and I'm grieving.

Here are my closest friends, my sisters really, that I just had to leave in Swaziland. This was lunch right before I flew out. I miss these girls already!

I'll be processing a lot through writing and I have tons on my mind. Gotta board the plane! (p.s. i love hi speed wireless)

Receiving on someone else's birthday

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Phumlile, the quiet and sweet-spirited one on the Cherish team celebrated her 22nd birthday on Thursday. After the team coming and the retreat the girls had a few days to recoup and Phumlile went home to Nhlangano, about an hour from our office. We were suppossed to come back together on Wednesday but Phumlile called and said she had a funeral she had to go to. Thursday morning, Phumlile told the story of why she had gone to the funeral...

At a branch of my church in Lavumisa a girl my age killed herself after she found out she was pregnant. My pastor knew that I and 3 or 4 other girls at my church had gone through a Bible Study on sexual purity. One of the mother's of the other girls had told my pastor about the Bible study because since her daughters had gone through it, they are radically different. 'The girls used to be so naughty but now they are the first to say 'let's pray' or 'we are going to church'. My pastor asked the 3 girls in the study to speak at church on Sunday what they learned to encourage the other young girls. Tuesday evening was the funeral of the girl and the pastor from that girl's church asked us to come and talk about Cherish at the funeral. It was the perfect time because so many were shaken up about the girl's death and were eager to hear what we had to say. We gave one of the leader's of the youth group at that church a Cherish Bible study and she's going to start one at the church. The youth leader is going to come to my church once a month to share what is going on and ask questions.

Psalms 33:10-12 says "But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations". The Lord is using this Bible study as an instrument to further His kingdom specifically in the young women in Swaziland. I love that I had absolutely nothing to do with this new group starting 2 hours from where I live. Whatever the Lord plans will stand firm. The gift I received on Phumlile's birthday was more confirmation that I'm suppossed to go. This is God's work here, He doesn't need me to do anything, He can do it Himself. He just chose to bless me for the last 2 years in being a part of it.

Blog Entry

Wed, 27 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Here's what Julie (one of my co-laborers here in Swaziland) had to say about the retreat...

Cleansed, Cherished, Child of God

In Swaziland they refer to the "Three C's" of how a guy can get a girl to sleep with him: clothes, cash, cell phone. It's sick but true...not just true that they talk about it, but true that many girls actually have sex w/ a guy because he gives her one of the above. The camp for 200+ highschool girls that took place here this past weekend focused on a new set "life giving" C's: Cleansed, Cherished, and Child of God. It was GREAT.

My favorite part of retreats like this is getting people out of their normal setting, and being able to witness the sense of freedom there is when they get a small escape from the hard circumstances they may face in their every day lives. I've seen it at the women's retreats I've helped coordinate, and it was definitely evident this past weekend as well. I especially loved hearing the girls sing during worship. Here are the words to the song they loved the most and sang the loudest.

I have a Maker, he formed my heart, before even time began, my life was in his hand.

I have a Father, He calls me his own, He'll never leave me, no matter where I go.

He knows my name, he knows my every thought,

He sees each tear that falls and he hears me when I call.

It was BEAUTIFUL!

Another highlight was see the young Swazi women (that have been discipled by my co-worker Becca over the last 2 yrs) up front leading the whole thing. They are HUGE proof that God is doing some wonderful things here.

Last week God gave me a glimpse of why events like this weekend are so so so important. Thoko is one of the women I work with. She asked if I could help take her 25 yr old daughter Lindiwe to the clinic Tuesday morning. Thoko homestead is across a small valley and you can't drive directly up to the house. Lindiwe was so weak that her brother had to push her in a whell barrow across the vally to the road where they could get transport.

When Thoko called me they were waiting alongside the road in town. Lindiwe was just sitting in the grass and had to be lifted into my car. Thoko has had multiple children pass away, and when I went to pick them up, it was obvious that Lindiwe could very well be the next one.As Thoko and I were helping her up the ramp to the clinic I started thinking more about Lindiwe's situation... I've heard the the HIV virus usually lays dormat in the body for 8+ years before a person will start to see it's effects. Lindiwe is 25, which means 8 years ago she was 17...probably close to the average age of the girls that attended the camp this weekend. Now, 8 years later Lindiwe is so thin, too weak to walk or speak. Please join me in praying that the girls who attended the camp will be strong healthy women of God in 8 years, who continue to be confident in the truth that they are cleansed, cherished, children of God!

I was the official grocery shopper for the camp...so on top of getting to observe the really great stuff happening, I also got to hang out in butcher shops, and fight off the salesmen at the produce market. The 200+ could not only sing well, they could also eat really well!

Bless Julie for buying all the food for the team from RiverLakes and for all the girls at the retreat!! For more about julie and what God's doing through her in Swaziland http://julieanderson.myadventures.org

Better for the Kingdom.

Tue, 26 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

"Pull off here" He whispered in my heart. I pulled off the main road to the Swaziland Glass Factory and had no idea why the Lord was having me go here. I figured I just would find a nice place to sit and look out on the beautiful Swazi scenery. I walked up the stairs to the "observation deck" thinking it would be a great view. When I got up to the top of the stairs the heat overwhelmed me and the Lord whispered again "this is why I brought you here, I have something to tell you". I was in the glass factory and walking around the top of it looking down on the workers melting the hot glass in the 1300 degree Celsius furnaces. The story of how they make the glass and the story of the factory is on the wall around the factory so I began to read it. I got to the distribution board and it had a cute picture of a Swazi woman with a big smile on her face wrapping up the glass and it said "to be sent to South Africa and the U.S." and as my eyes fell upon "U.S." my heart sank and I began to cry. "No, no, no" I was whispering under my breath but the Lord was saying "Bec, you're going back". By this time I was sobbing and He made more and more clear to me as I walking around the factory that Swaziland has been a preparation time, preparing me for what I still don't know, but He had to bring me hear and break me, put me through the fire alone so that I could rely on no one but Him so I could be moldable for Him to make me into His vessel; a vessel that was now Better for the Kingdom.

The rest of the weekend, I sobbed in my room asking all the "Why's" you could think of and still in a state of shock. Sunday morning as I was pouring my wounded heart out to my precious Savior He said I'm going to turn your mourning into dancing'. I was so deep in grieving I couldn't imagine dancing but He revealed to me that the Swazis that I have been working with are going to continue the work and that me being here would hinder them. As long as I'm here, they won't step up and take charge. So I'm leaving in September and the only reason I can tell you is it is Better for the Kingdom.

Retreat Review

Sun, 24 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Words cannot describe the retreat and even as I look over the pictures they also don't do it justice. To be honest I was surprised that nothing went wrong - all the vehicles worked in fact the girls showed up an hour early (which is unheard of), all 200 of us stayed healthy - it was amazing! I'm gonna stop talking and let the pictures do the talking...

The venue for the camp was at boarding school in Manzini (1 of the 2 main cities in Swaziland). The team from RiverLakes and a few other friends from the States as well as my Swazi team decorated the auditorium where all of our group meetings were. The theme of the camp was CHILD.CHERISHED.CLEANSED. In Swaziland they have what's called the 3 C's. Men with money will have sex with the girls in exchange Cash, Car (the girls ride in the car), Cell Phone (or clothing). So we replaced those 3 C's with why the girls shouldn't have sex. CHILD - God is their Father and He will provide all of their needs, they don't need to look to these men. CHERISHED - They are loved by God so much so that He gave His only Son for them and that these men who say "I love you" do not mean it, they are only trying to get them to sleep with them. CLEANSED - so many of them have already been sexually active and they carry around this shame. They feel dirty and they think since they've already started having sex they might as well continue but we shared that they are cleansed in the blood of Christ.

When the girls arrived they each got a purse sewn by Dan's aunt. Inside they got a journal, a toiletry kit, pens, lip gloss. I think they liked it...what do you think? Take note of Busi, the one who is clutching the journal, has been radically transformed since she was given life through Christ. Busi's story will come in the days to come.

The girls got settled in their rooms. They took up 3 dorms upstairs and downstairs. Once settled in they went next to the dining hall and got pedicures and a new pair of flip flops so they wouldn't mess up their toes.

We had group sessions where all 200 of us met for worship and teachings. The girls would start in song occopella and it would fill the auditorium and fill my heart. It's hard to explain but when they sing the SiSwati worship songs it is as if a switch is turned on inside all of them and they get up and dance - it's involuntary they just can't help but have rhythm.

Saturday and Sunday afternoon was free time. The girls broke up into teams for volleyball and netball (like basketball) or they could do a craft. The craft was from Bev's (one of the teachers on my church's team) who taught on the treasures of our heart. We had to decide if we were going to have the worlds treasures (cash, car, cell phone,

clothes) or God's treaures of more of Him through prayer and getting in His Word. Then after every group session we would hand the girls something on their way out to remind them of each teaching. After "child" they got an adoption certificate from God, "cherished" they got a small tea cup because Cathy gave that as an example of something she cherished and after "cleansed" they got a ticket that said "paid in full" that Christ has paid the full penalty for our sin so we can be cleansed.

The backbone of the retreat - 1) Discussion Groups and the 2)Prayer Room. Every time I would ask any of the girls "what is the best part of the retreat so far?" they would all answer "discussion groups". We broke the girls into small groups to talk about what they had learned in the teaching sessions and how to apply it in their lives. Okay, i'll be honest, one of the girls responded "the food" cuz we ate well but EVERY other girl said the discussion groups. These girls don't have people they can talk with about these issues and so for them to have an entire weekend to learn and share, the loved it. 2) The prayer room - the Lord made it clear we were to have 24 hour prayer throughout the retreat so there was a prayer room and it was the reason the retreat went so well, we were covered. It was a place to come and lay burdens at the cross, thank God for what He's done, praise Him, write prayer requests and pray through Scripture.

Thank you to all those who were praying, to those who sponsored a girl or gave financially to the retreat. These girls will never forget that weekend. The Reed Dance is this week where the girls come for a week and collect reeds to build the fence for the queen mother's house and then dance for the king. I know some of the girls who were at our retreat have to go and i'm praying they would see such a radical difference between something done for the king and something that the King of Kings ordained for them. Those girls got loved on like never before, they didn't know what was coming, Praise you, Lord. I love how much you love your daughters.

On our last meeting before the girls went home I told the girls I wanted to ask them a question. I said "Baphi bosisi abahamba noJesu" which means "Where are the sisters who are walking with Jesus" and then all who are walking with Jesus reply "Hallelujah". I didn't know they were going to come on stage with me...press play in the center of the video below. If you didn't already wish you were there from the rest of this story, you will now.

I can hardly sit still...

Fri, 8 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I'm so excited! We (the Cherish team, me, and several of my favorite people from Swaziland) are leaving for Johannesburg to go to the Passion Conference tomorrow. Also the team from my church (including my mom and sister) are this weekend along with Beth and Holly, who I lived with in Swaziland in 2006. And all the retreat preparations are coming together and I'm looking forward to getting all the girls together for the glory of His name.

We still have 40 girls not sponsored, so if you'd like to get involved let me know. It's $35/girl for the camp.

Please pray:

1. Health and safety (we'll be driving a lot in the next few days)for my team and the team that is coming.

2. To protect my time and intimacy with the Lord and communication with Him as things are getting busy.

3. Vehicles - Pray that our vehicles work as God intended them.

4. Preparation for the hearts of the girls that they would hear God and experience Him during the retreat (Aug 15-18).

5. Details, details, details - There are so many of these and the Lord just keeps showing me that everything is in His hands. These are His daughters, His Word, we are His servants. I keep praying Lord help me get everything done that I need to and wisdom of things I don't need to do.

This is how we overcome

Sat, 2 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Revelation 12:10 says the enemy is the accuser of all Christians "he accuses them day and night".

I hate the enemy, I hate him! Yesterday, I sat down with Patience, the head leader of the Bible Study at one of the schools, and she told me the news: one of the Bible Study leaders had gotten pregnant. My heart sunk and I got sick to my stomach as I saw the dismay on Patience's face and thought "I never would have thought she would have..." My heart aches for the girl because her life will never be the same. The school only has about 900 students so when one falls pregnant every one knows about it. Patience and the other 40 girls in the group are now getting mocked at school and being called hypocrites.

Patience also told me that a few weeks ago she was at home one day and the rest of her family was at school or work. A man who she knows of but doesn't know well came to the house, tied her up, gagged her and knocked her to the ground. He had a knife and cut her pants off and was about to rape when randomly her uncle came home from the work in the middle of the day. The guy ran off but Patience reported him to the police and has now been arrested. I tell you this for two reasons - First, I want to glorify the Lord for His evident hand in this situation. The fact that the man was stopped is an absolute miracle because unfortunately this is an all too common reality for so many girls here. Also, Patience was extremely brave to go and tell the police because most police officers won't take her seriously because she's just a teenage girl leaving so many of these instances to go unreported. Lastly, they actually found the guy and the police followed through with the arrest. Thank you, Jesus!!

Secondly, I want to ask for prayer for our leaders and the participants in the Bible Studies. These girls are targets and are ministers of the gospel on the front lines. As the Kingdom of God advances the enemy tries to steal, kill, and destroy. He goes after the leaders because just one person can take out an entire group of people. Revelation 12:10 is true that he is constantly after us, accusing, attacking but the next verse is of the most importance - "[WE] OVERCAME HIM BY THE BLOOD OF THE LAMB AND BY THE WORD OF OUR TESTIMONY; WE DO NOT LOVE OUR LIVES SO MUCH AS TO SHRINK FROM DEATH. THEREFORE [WE MUST] REJOICE...!" Sure he accuses but we have already won, we are victorious in Christ, our Savior is the head over every power and authority...and (He) disarmed the powers and authorities, He made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross (Col. 2:9-11, 13-15). We can't shrink back when these troubles come and the words of Patience ring over in my head "I've never faced so many troubles as this". I told her it's because you are now working for the Lord so you are a threat to the kingdom of darkness. We can't shrink. No, we must rejoice. Rejoice? Why? Because we have overcome everything by the blood of the lamb and by testifying about God's work in and through our lives. I think that's amazing that our testimonies overcome the accuser. Share continually what God has done and is doing in your lives, it's part of how we overcome!

One way you can encourage and better equip our leaders is by getting involved. We are having a retreat for all the girls who have gone through the Bible Study (250 total) on August 15. The retreat is free for the girls so we can have all of them come. Would you like to sponsor a girl to go to the camp to further encourage and teach them about God's design for sexual purity and their identity in Christ. So far we have 165 sponsored but we need 85 more. It's $35 per girl, please email me or post on here how many girls you would like to sponsor and I'll get you the rest of the information.

Spiritual vs. Secular

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT

One of my favorite books is Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer, one of His chapters talks about how we in our minds most of us separate the secular and the spiritual. For example we would say, making reservations at a hotel is secular whereas teaching a Bible Study is spiritual. We aren't suppossed to be locked up in our houses or even be at Bible Study ALL THE TIME, we have to get out so the Lord can use us according to His will, whether you are washing the dishes or helping to "wash" away someone sins, if the Lord told you to do it, it's 'spiritual'.

Yesterday was cool because we went to train the Bible Study leaders at the school. I also was suppossed to make reservations at the guest house near the school for the team coming in August. I ask facetiously, Which one was more "spiritual"? Upon arrival at the guest house I met, Atonet, one of the owners of the guest house and made the reservation. She began asking questions about what the team would be doing and I started telling her about the Bible Study we were doing at the high school. She said that her and her mother didn't have any thing "as organized" (her words) as I did but they began to meet with women that lived around the guest house. Atonet told me she was looking for a Bible Study to lead with the women and she was sure the Lord had sent me not only to make reservations but to answer her petition to Him. She was even more elated when I told her I had an extra copy of the Bible Study with me in the car that she could have. She continued to tell me that someone in her family had called to ask her what time she was finishing work that day and she said 6 even though she always leaves at 5. Even when she said 6 she was thinking to herself "why 6? why did i say that?" but she went ahead and stayed. We arrived at 5:30 to make the reservation and after receiving the Bible Study from me she said "This is the reason, this is why I was suppossed to stay until 6 today, I was suppossed to meet you get this Bible Study."

It reminds me of Matthew 28:18 that says "AS YOU GO, make disciples of all nations..". The Lord uses the tasks of this world to make more disciples in places we would never think to minister to.

Bibo

Fri, 11 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Zabiba, lovingly nicknamed Bibo, walked into my life and became a co-laborer in freeing Swazi girls from sexual bondage just 4 months ago. The other 2 who work with me, I've seen them through since their birth (spiritually) but Bibo had already been walking with the Lord for some years. I feel like the Lord just lets me be a part of what He's doing in her life and be a cheerleader for her. She finished high school a year ago and then went on to do a gap year of school in South Africa last year in hopes of starting University at the beginning of this year. This girl is so smart and was extremely involved in leadership at school but for some reason was not hearing back from her University...so she started working with us for the time being because of her passion to tell girls about sexual purity.

She applied again to school and was suppossed to hear back in June if she was accepted and she has still never heard a word. She was fasting and praying seeking the Lord's will on this when He began to show her that what she thought she wanted to do in school was not His will for her and in the last few weeks He has completely changed her desires. Now she's hearing from other schools who are ready to accept her for the new major the Lord has laid on her heart and the Lord has confirmed it through different believers, she keeps saying "I never throught I would __________" and I keep saying "join the club". I've been able to tell her how I was pursuing one career and the Lord changed my vision from the career to Him and He began to show me His heart for the women of Africa. What i thought would be the most miserable life anyone could possibly live (living in Africa as a missionary) turned out to be the thing that brought me unexplainable joy and the Lord knew it all along...He predestined me to do that before the beginning of time (Eph. 2:10)
We are studying Who I Am in Christ by Neil Anderson and with Bibo she's realizing her identity was in her major she was pursuing (biotechnology - yeah, told you she is smart) and the Lord is saying "your identity is not in what you do, but what I did for you". Pray for Bibo, she's going through quite a season of growth and the Lord's stripping her of the things she used to think were her identity and showing her her identity in Christ.

It's in the Journey

Tue, 1 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT

The Lord has me in this place of asking me to do bigger things and giving me less details and at the same time just began a new book Fresh Faith by Jim Cymbala. The premise is rooted in Hebrews 11:6, that without faith it is IMPOSSIBLE to please God. While I'm stumbling through the things He's asking me to walk through He just keep showing me His enjoyment of me having to lean fully on Him.

Last week, I had the African fluthere's nothing like itand spent most of the week in bed but Thursday night the Lord told me to take my girls up to Execution Rock to discuss the assurance of our salvation but right before we left, I was talking to co-worker of mine and I soon thought to blind fold the girls and have them lead one another up the rock as a team building activity. I was not blindfolded as I was leading the way but as I was watching them the Lord gave me a visual of what He was doing with me. During the flat parts the girls would just hold hands but on the steep rocky parts they were almost clinging to one another and leaning fully on the other to feel the other one's every move.

"I will never leave you nor forsake you". This verse popped in my head because the Lord says this so many times throughout His Word when His children are going through difficult things, He assures them of His presence. When the girls were walking on the slippery parts it didn't matter the terrain so much because next to them was someone who could see the way, someone who loved them and someone they could trust.

When I was going up I thought, we have to be closewhere's the topand once I got to the top we only stayed for about 20 minutes and the Lord whispered "It's in the journey". He's not so interested in the destination but the journey and the relationship built from that journey.

Lord, I feel like my eyes are covered but I know you are present, don't let go, please keep speaking - I get nervous when you're quiet - and help me to find joy in the journey with you. I have to say you're the most fun and exciting of anyone I knowoh the places you have led me J.

Sisters Weekend

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT

This is Heather, one of my little sisters in Christ. Heather and I go to church together in Bakersfield, CA and she came on a 6 week trip to Johannesburg (4 hour drive from my house in Swaziland) with her University to teach English. I can't explain how fun it is to see someone from home on the other side of the world. Heather is one of those with great "Kingdom perspective", for example she understands it's not up to her to change an entire way of life that people have lived for centuries but rather to do what God has called her to do specifically and leave the rest to Him. Pray for Heather as she heads back home and re-enters American culture. Specifically pray for words of how to describe her trip to people back home. And praise the Lord that He confirmed her passion is teaching and she definitely has a missionary heart.

Ruth, another sister and co-laborer in Christ based in Johannesburg. Ruth is the precious instrument who wrote the Bible Study on sexual purity that I have been teaching in Swaziland. Ruth was having a retreat weekend for some of her girls and I got to drop in on them. I love Ruth's heart for the teenage girls and for them to know God more. Pray for Ruth as she is trying to renew her VISA to stay in South Africa this week(she's originally from the UK). I love meeting up with Ruth whenever I can to bounce ideas off of and encourage one another. I took the Cherish Bible Study to Swaziland but 2 other women have taken it to Botswana and Zambia and began Cherish studies there. My heart beats wildly when I think of God impacting so many lives in Southern Africa to raise up a generation of women seeking purity and following hard after the Lord.

Thembi, my big sister in Swaziland, came with me so that I didn't have to drive to Joburg by myself. She is such a fun traveling buddy, i've laughed so much this weekend. Thembi insisted on holding her mini Bible in the picture which is precious because in the last month or so Thembi has become so consumed with the Lord. Everytime I talk to her, I'm like "what are you doing?" "I'm busy with the things of the Lord". I gave her one of my favorite books, Praying God's Word by Beth Moore, and she cannot put it down. She took it to work and has now been sharing all that she's learning with her co-workers and the testimony of what God is doing through Thembi there is amazing. Every time I say "Thembi, how can i pray for you" she says "Pray that I will know Him more". So would you also pray "Lord, I pray that Thembi would have the Spirit of wisdom and revelation so that she would know Him more and she know her glorious inheritance as a saint".

We also have a testimony, well several on this trip that we have seen God's mercy, faithfulness etc. Last night, we were driving to go find Heather on the Joburg freeways (much like the LA freeways), and as we were driving this car came up fast behind us and the next thing I know it slammed into the back of us and we heard "crunch" and the guy sped off. Our car was still driveable so I followed the guy and we got his registration and called the police. We were praying and praying and I just kept saying "Lord this is your car, your money is going to have to pay for it, you bring justice to this situation". We got to Heather's place and there was not a scratch on my car. I couldn't believe it, Thembi and I were both like "we heard it hit though". It was the craziest thing because the car just literally bounced off of us. Thembi and i were just praising the Lord for His goodness, He takes such good care of us. I have so many testimonies of the Lord this weekend, I'm amazed by Him! (P.S. it is full on winter in Johannesburg, brrrr)

Prayer

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Of course as we are getting in the full swing of ministry, we are facing opposition personally and as a team.

Hloniphile (back) had her purse stolen on Saturday that had her phone, money, Bible, passport etc. Phumlile (middle) also had money stolen from her this week. Zabiba (front) had a friend just try to commit suicide and is now in the hospital.

Phumlile and Zabiba have applied for University and as a team we are praying and fasting this week that they will here back from their schools. Zabiba is suppossed to start in July and Phumlile in August, but no one has heard anything from the school.

Please cover us as a team in prayer and specifically for unity among us.

Anguish

Thu, 12 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT

"Becca, I hate to tell you this but one of your girls just dropped out of school, she's pregnant""The girl you have been ministering to, she was out of school last week, we sent her home because she was possessed by a demon""There's no Bible at home, my parents only refer to the ancestors""Dear Becca, please help, I'm HIV positive""The women keep coming to me from the community asking for food and I don't have any, I don't know what to do""Hello, my name is Lindiwe. My parents are not working, my mother is sick. My older brother was paying for my school fees and he just lost his job. Can you help?""You see the teacher that just walked by, she recently gave birth to twins, and one of them just died""Did I tell you about my sister-in-law? She went to the doctor and they told her the baby died inside of her.""I can't believe what happened to pastorhe was put in the isolation room in the mental ward"..."Two students parents just died, they have no one. The money from government went to relatives who took the money for themselves. Yes, government pays for their school fees but who pays for food? For soap to wash themselves and their clothes?"

When is it too much? All but one of these phrases I've heard in the last 24 hours, the other in the last week. I immediately want to run to something (unfortunately) to comfort me, to numb this. Fortunately the Lord gave me a way out of the temptation to turn to something and just allowed me to feel all of this. The best way I could describe the status of my heart was "in anguish". You know that uncomfortable feeling that nothing can soothe? And the Lord just let me feel all of these things and I just wept and wept and yelled and beat my pillow and kicked my bag across the floor

He didn't say "give money" no he said "feel thismourn with those who mournI know what your heart is going through, I went through it, so much so my sweat during prayer turned to drops of blood". I'm so tired of people dying, I'm sick of it! I'm sick of parents dying and leaving their children uncared for. I'm sick of babies dying for preventable reasons.

Sights of Swaziland

Mon, 9 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Beautiful Scenery -I've never gotten tired of it.

My church just put up a tent on our own plot of land so we don't have to rent any more. This was an exciting day and a celebration for my church family.

The same day the tent was up the kids at church presented our Pastor's Wife a cake for her birthday

Cell phone in one hand, a live chicken in the other - Welcome to Africa!

Sometimes I still think "I can't believe I live in africa"

Swazi traditional healer

Favorite on the road snack - roasted mbila (field corn) - only $.50 and they deliver right to your car window! Watch out McDonalds.

Humbled

Sun, 8 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Last Saturday, the Lord confirmed "This has nothing to do with me". About a month ago, the 3 girls I work with went with me to South Africa for a prayer retreat. As we sought the Lord He was giving them more ideas for the Bible Study while to me He just kept saying "Step Back". So I gave the girls the mandate that if the Bible Studies were going to continue was up to them. Meanwhile I'm working on the Card Project and the retreat in August for all the girls who have gone through the Bible Study.

Last school term (January-April) we had 70 girls go through the Bible Study and now 40 of those are leaders for the next term (May-August) for 160 more girls. Saturday we had the leader training and 1leader (there are 2 per group) came to my house for training. I was humbled as Zabiba, Phumlile, and Hloniphile planned and ran the entire training and I watched with joy. I just kept thinking "This is going great and I had nothing to do with it". It is awesome how God put my team together with Zabiba as the teacher, Phumlile as the behind the scenes girl, and Hloniphile as the organizer - beautiful!

The 20 leaders came from all over the country. Several of them left their house at 4am to walk to catch the bus and then had a 2 hour bus ride. The Lord just kept saying "This is the fruit" and I'm just humbled. I've done nothing to deserve to be a part of this and yet the Lord has poured out his grace upon me. These young women are going to be the future mothers of this next generation that is going to be HIV free. These ladies are not only going to teach their peers now but they are going to teach their children and grandchildren.

May we be oaks of righteousness, plantings of you in Swaziland for the display of your splendor.

Yay for Steve and Dave!

Thu, 5 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Steve and Dave, 2 of my pastors from RiverLakes (My home church), came Thursday evening and just left Monday morning. Here's a picture journal :)

My friend, Angel, and I met Steve and Dave at the border and then had dinner at my favorite little restaurant. Yes, we met them at the border, they wanted to find their way from Johannesburg to Swaziland - i thought they were crazy too :)

Friday morning we hiked up to Sibebe Rock, the largest granite dome in the world. Okay I know a picture says 1000 words but this picture is lying, i did not have attitude, I promise. I was just trying to see where Dave thought we were on the map. They said follow the yellow arrows up but we only saw 1 yellow arrow at the beginning of the 2 hour hike and never saw another one.

Nice view huh? We went up to the top and prayed over the country - it was awesome.

Okay, so we didnt make it up to Sibebe, we couldn't find it but we hiked up this rock. It's called Sina (see-nah) Rock, so the joke was "Well i seen a rock". To give you an idea how high it is that little "pebble" on the top of the rock in the middle is about the size of a car.

Dave preached a powerful sermon on forgiveness on Sunday. I had several friends from church say they felt like that sermon was just for them. Praise you, Lord.

My 3 Pastors - That's my Pastor here in Swaziland, Pastor Caiphus.

Sunday evening, i invited a few friends over to meet Steve and Dave and it turned out we had about 30 people and some friends came and played the drums and led us in an awesome worship time.

They were only here for 3 1/2 days but it was so great to have them. My favorite times with them were having talks over breakfast but of course there are no pictures of that.

You live on a speck, Bec

Tue, 27 May 2008 00:00:00 GMT

"It's not about you". Only God can say this and my feelings not be crushed. This is what keeps getting whispered in my ear. Yesterday, there was a special showing of a movie (you must know how rare that is) of "Horton Hears a Who", a recent Dr. Seuss film. Horton is an elephant that sees a speck of dust fly by and somehow thinks, "I wonder if anyone lives on that speck of dust". He hears something from the dust speck and not only does someone live on the speck of dust but an entire community lives there. They have cars and technology and they thought they were very well educated. They were consumed with the affairs of their community and were completely unaware of how small they were until Horton tries to communicate with them. When he yells over the piece of dust it comes out of a horn over the Mayor's door. The Mayor and Horton begin to communicate and through the Mayor Horton wants to warn the entire community that destruction is coming so they have to listen to his instructions because he has the big picture perspective. In the meantime the villain characters think Horton is crazy so they try to get rid of the flower that the dust is currently resting on and of course the Who community have no idea what is going on, they can't see it, they just notice weather changes and earthquakes what things cover the speck of dust or when Horton falls.

The Mayor tries to warn the community elders and of course they don't believe him. Mayor asks Horton to speak so everyone can hear Horton and can justify the Mayor's story. They hear Horton and then Horton has to justify to his community there are people on the speck so the people try to make as much noise as possible so they can be heard because they can't be seen and of course no one can hear them but Horton.

I can't help but think of every prophet of the Lord. God comes to one person and speaks to him to warn the community. In the heavenlies there are things that the human minds can't comprehend because they are so small but only the Lord can tell them what is going on in the unseen. The prophets faced loneliness and rejection until what they had said would happen did happen and the people realized "Oh, he was from God".

(Note - I'm not comparing God to Horton, that would be ridiculous) but it allowed me to see my size and role compared to God. God Almighty is omnipresent - It's not that He is in my room, in my car, in Chinano, He is so big compared to the small speck of dust that He is everywhere because our small speck of dust fits in His huge right hand. And also about His presence of how important it is. God says so many times "Don't fear, I'll be with you" and as I watched Horton he loved that little speck and so when it was in his possession they were safe, it was only when a vulture snatched the flower up and Horton was separated from it were they really in danger.

And when the people tried to make get Horton's community to hear them. I was thinking, that's ridiculous, they are so small, there's no way they are going to be heard. And then I was thinking how we are heard from this speck of dust when we worship God in fellowship with other believers.

You and I live on a speck of dust, called earth, and somehow our big God wants came and spoke to us and wants a relationship with us. He has the big perspective and we are in His loving hands, He just needs us to cooperate with what He says.