Better for the Kingdom.
“Pull off here” He whispered in my heart. I pulled off the main road to the Swaziland Glass Factory and had no idea why the Lord was having me go here. I figured I just would find a nice place to sit and look out on the beautiful Swazi scenery. I walked up the stairs to the “observation deck” thinking it would be a great view. When I got up to the top of the stairs the heat overwhelmed me and the Lord whispered again “this is why I brought you here, I have something to tell you”. I was in the glass factory and walking around the top of it looking down on the workers melting the hot glass in the 1300 degree Celsius furnaces. The story of how they make the glass and the story of the factory is on the wall around the factory so I began to read it. I got to the distribution board and it had a cute picture of a Swazi woman with a big smile on her face wrapping up the glass and it said “to be sent to South Africa and the U.S.” and as my eyes fell upon “U.S.” my heart sank and I began to cry. “No, no, no” I was whispering under my breath but the Lord was saying “Bec, you’re going back”. By this time I was sobbing and He made more and more clear to me as I walking around the factory that Swaziland has been a preparation time, preparing me for what I still don’t know, but He had to bring me hear and break me, put me through the fire alone so that I could rely on no one but Him so I could be moldable for Him to make me into His vessel; a vessel that was now Better for the Kingdom. 
The rest of the weekend, I sobbed in my room asking all the “Why’s” you could think of and still in a state of shock. Sunday morning as I was pouring my wounded heart out to my precious Savior He said ‘I’m going to turn your mourning into dancing’. I was so deep in grieving I couldn’t imagine dancing but He revealed to me that the Swazis that I have been working with are going to continue the work and that me being here would hinder them. As long as I’m here, they won’t step up and take charge. So I’m leaving in September and the only reason I can tell you is it is Better for the Kingdom.
